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7 Things successful people often tell themselves

Successful people tend to have very positive inner dialogues.

They know how to nurture their own personal growth. They believe they can do whatever it is they set their mind to. But most of all, they believe in themselves.

If you look at the differences between those who achieve their goals and those who fail, what you’ll usually find is a lack of self belief. Those who fail tend to plan for failure.

There is something to be said about the relationship you have with yourself — and the way you encourage (or discourage) your actions. If you are overly critical every step of the way, chances are, you’re going to lose your motivation to keep trying.

The key is to be patient, positive, and understanding of the process.

Here are 7 things successful people all tell themselves on a daily basis:

1. “I will figure it out.”

People who succeed don’t plan for failure.

Instead, they plan for obstacles. They know there will be challenges. They know they will need to find their own solutions. So, instead of planning on dealing with defeat, they master skill sets that prepare them for the worst.

They tell themselves, over and over again, “I will figure it out. No matter what.”

And they do.

2. “Everything in the world was built by people no smarter than you.”

This Steve Jobs quote has become a mantra for successful people all over the world.

Those who achieve their goals don’t see the world as fixed, or set in stone. They see it as malleable, constantly moving, ready to be disrupted by the next great idea. And they see themselves as the person fit for the job.

The moment you realize that the world around you was made by other people just like you — people who woke up one day and decided to start working relentlessly toward their vision — is the moment you’re able to take full control over your life.

3. “Never mistakes. Only lessons.”

People who achieve big things in their lifetime operate under the assumption that in every mistake is a lesson.

They don’t get bogged down making themselves feel bad for a misstep. They don’t punish themselves for doing something wrong. They take everything in stride, in order to keep moving in a positive direction.

Calling something a “mistake” is almost counterproductive.

Call it a lesson instead.

4. “Work hard to know what you don’t know.”

There is a misconception that all successful people are egotistical, or “have it all figured out.”

The truth is, most very successful people are the complete opposite. They are extremely open, ready and willing to learn — always on the lookout for the next thing they don’t know.

This is such an important distinction between those who achieve short-term success and those who are able to sustain it over long periods of time. Success is all about being aware of your next weakness, the next thing you can improve.

And in order to do that, you have to know what you don’t know.

5. “Forget your competition.”

While there is absolutely something to be said for keeping tabs on your competitors, I’ve found the most successful individuals to be hyper focused on their own direction and where it is they feel they need to go.

Reason being, focusing on your competition for too long can cause you to be distracted. You end up making decisions based on someone else, rather than questioning what would be best for you, your team, your company, etc.

Successful people forget their competition.

6. “Take the time to get it right in the beginning.”

I find that most successful people work very, very hard in the beginning of projects, engagements, deals, etc., to make positively sure every single element is on track. They know that if they take the time to get things right from the start, they don’t have to put out fires half-way through.

It’s all about attention to detail.

7. “Never forget why you started.”

Again, I am constantly surprised by people who have achieved massive amounts of success in their lives, and how connected they are to the beginning of their journey.

They remember where they started. They remind themselves often why they got into the business they’re in. Their motivation comes from a love for growth, not necessarily the achievement of an end goal.

In order to maintain long-term success, this is a crucial part of the process. You have to remember why you started down this road in the first place — and do everything in your power to make sure you never forget it.

December 17, 2019
Signs that indicate you are a people-pleaser

There is a thin line between being nice to people and people-pleasing. It is one thing to always want to help people to make them happy but when this goes beyond simple kindness, then you are toeing the line of people-pleasing.

People-pleasing You might go out of your way to do things for the people in your life, based on what you assume they want or need. You give up your time and energy to get them to like you.

Being a people-pleaser is a damaging habit as you neglect yourself and place people’s wants as more important than our own needs.

Keep reading to recognise some telltale signs that can help you know if you are a people-pleaser. You have a low opinion of yourself.

Low self-esteem

People pleasers often deal with low self-esteem and draw their self-worth from the approval of others. You convince yourself that people care about you when you are useful to them and their praise/appreciation acts as a validation to your existence.

You need others to like you

As a people-pleaser, one of your major fears is the fear of rejection hence you are constantly doing things in a bid to get others to like and accept you. You go out of your way for people in a bid to feel needed as you believe that their needing you make it harder for them to reject you. It’s hard for you to say “no”

You find it hard to say no

It doesn’t matter if you want to do it or not, you simply find yourself saying yes to request people ask of you because it seems like a safer option. The truth is when you are unable to stand your ground and turn down people, some unscrupulous personalities will take advantage of you and ignore your boundaries because they know you will do what they want.

You are comfortable with always taking the blame

People-pleasing involves readiness to take on the blame, even when what happened has nothing to do with you. You apologise because you feel terrible and not taking the blame may mean that people will not like you.

Agreeability often seems like a surefire way to win approval

If you go along with something you don’t agree with just to keep everyone happy, you’re setting yourself (and others) up for future frustration. If both of the plans have clear flaws, you’re doing everyone a disservice by not speaking up.

You’re a giver

As a people-pleaser, you tend to continue giving because you hope this will in turn make people show you love and affection. If you like giving to tohers with the goal of being liked then you are a people-pleaser.

December 11, 2019
Simple things that enhance the brain power

Here are simple things to do that will enhance your brain power:

Do Your Most Difficult Tasks in the Morning – Our brains work at their best when they are fresh and energized after a good night’s sleep. If you have a task to do that requires a lot of thought and focus, the best time to do that task would be first thing in the morning when your brain is at its freshest. This is one of the reasons why checking emails first thing in the morning is not a good idea. You are wasting your brain’s best hours on a simple task that can be done when your brain is not at its freshest. Throughout the day, you will find the amount of time you can focus for will fall. Your decision making abilities will also begin to weaken as the day progresses. This is called “decision fatigue” and that means the decisions you make later in the day will not be as good as the decisions you make earlier in the day. It’s far better to do your most difficult and creative tasks early taking advantage of your brain’s higher energy levels.

Get Enough Breaks – Our brains are not very good at maintaining concentration and focus for more than an hour. Once you go beyond a certain amount of time doing focused work, you will find yourself making more and more mistakes. This is a sign that your brain is tired and needs a break. Taking the right kind of break is important. Switching from working on complex spreadsheet to checking your social media feeds are not going to give your brain the right kind of break. Instead, get up from your desk and head outside to some fresh air. If that is not possible, go to the nearest window and look outside. Your brain needs a break from the screen, not just the spreadsheet. So, leave your phone behind so you are not tempted to look at it and savor the view.

Read Books, Not Social Media Feeds – There are no shortcuts to improved knowledge and you are certainly not going to improve your general knowledge about anything useful by reading social media feeds. Instead, make reading books a regular habit. When you read good quality books, you increase your ability to use the knowledge you learn to solve problems as your brain will apply the knowledge you have learned to existing situations.

Exercise Regularly – Humans were not created to be stationary beings. You need to move. Had our ancestors spent their days sitting around, they wouldn’t have survived for long. To survive and find food, our ancestors had to keep moving. Our brains have developed to function at their best when we exercise our bodies. When we exercise, we increase the amount of oxygen in our brains and this helps to sharpen our brain’s function. A study shows that when previously sedentary group of people began a light exercise program, their cognitive skills improve as well as reaction times and quantitative skills.

Eat the Right Foods – You probably have experienced the afternoon slump at some point in your life. This is when you feel tired and fatigued in the mid-afternoon. This is the effect of the carbohydrates you ate at lunchtime, stimulating your body to produce insulin which then causes a drop in your blood sugar levels. When you go into an afternoon slump, concentrating for long periods become almost impossible and you just want to curl up and go to sleep. To prevent the afternoon slump, try to eat a protein-rich lunch. Keep some healthy snacks such as mixed nuts and dried bananas around your workspace and when you feel a little peckish, eat a few of these. Not only will you avoid the afternoon slump, but you will also improve your overall general health and feel a lot more energized.

Drink Enough Water – Your brain is made up of about 70% water, so without enough water, your brain will not function at its best. When you are not drinking enough water, you will loose your ability to concentrate, make decisions and stay alert. You will feel sleepy and weak. You brain functions at its best when it is properly hydrated. The solution is to keep a large bottle of water at your work station and sip regularly from it throughout the day. This will apparently increase the number of trips you need to make to the bathroom which indeed is a good thing. It will keep you moving and taking regular breaks from your screen.

Don’t Deprive Yourself of Sleep – You probably don’t need a long scientific study to convince you that if you are not getting enough sleep, you are not going to function at your best. You just need to go a couple of days without getting enough sleep and you feel your abilities reduced. Your decision-making skills become erratic, your energy levels drop and your ability to stay focused on your work diminishes. If you want to improve your brain’s ability to function at its best, then start with getting enough sleep. Six to eight hours is usually enough for most people, so make sure you are hitting that number of hours per night as a minimum.

December 11, 2019
3 Signs you are a toxic co-worker

Almost every workplace has at least one toxic employee . You know the type—always negative, tends to bully others, distracts much of the team … the ” bad apple” that ruins the barrel. But what if someone were to tell you that you were that person?
Before you balk in denial, take a look at some of these common traits toxic employees tend to have. If they remind you of someone who looks back at you in the mirror, there are steps you can take to rectify the situation—before your toxic tendencies ruin your career.

1. You Make Everything About You
This is something most people are guilty of at least once in their lives. Everyone goes through tough times or phases where they desire more attention than usual.
Perhaps you’re going through a bad breakup, or you recently learned about a family member’s terminal illness. Maybe you have insecurities about yourself and your talents at work. No matter the situation, these deep-seated feelings of anger, depression, or anxiety can manifest themselves into something negative at work—such as making the conversation about you.
Next time you’re involved in a group discussion at work or with your co-workers, make an effort to listen more and talk less. Notice if you feel the desire to chime in only to steer the conversation back to you. Instead of giving in to this tendency, ask someone else a question. Give another person the floor for a while, and let a co-worker have a chance to shine.
Only make a situation or conversation be about you if it really
is about you, or if it will add something of value to the discussion. Otherwise, practice your listening skills and give someone else the spotlight for once.

2. You Say and Do Passive-Aggressive Things
Passive aggressiveness is a classic example of toxic behavior at work. You spend more time in the workplace than anywhere else, besides home. Passive-aggressive behaviors such as giving backhanded compliments, ignoring a co-worker, or purposefully excluding someone can taint the entire workplace like a dark cloud.
If being passive-aggressive is a chronic behavior for you, it can be difficult to become aware of when you’re doing it, and even harder to make a change.
The first step is learning more about it. Passive aggressiveness can come through as a coping or defense mechanism. Toxic employees who use this outlet tend to do it when they feel threatened, jealous, or insecure.
Instead of coping with your feelings through aggression toward co-workers, get them out in a more productive way. For example,
physical exercise can release anger and other negative feelings. Fit in more exercise in your day, before work or during a lunch break. Take walks every couple of hours to get away from the computer screen. You’ll return to work with less pent-up anger or irritation.

3. You’re Jealous of the Success of Others
Let’s dive into jealousy just a bit more. It’s a common trait that can turn into toxic behavior at work. This can be especially true if you also happen to be a brilliant employee at your job. You know, the one who’s used to getting promotions, accolades, and pats on the back.
If a co-worker starts to get the attention instead, your jealous tendencies may show through in ways that make you a toxic presence in the office. You might express jealousy up front or through passive-aggressive behaviors, such as sarcastically telling the employee congratulations on getting a great opportunity.
At the heart of jealousy lies insecurity. Realize that your co-worker’s success in no way diminishes your own. Stop comparing yourself with others. Keep your own goals internal and focused, and you’ll feel more confident even when someone else gets something you wanted.
Obsessing about other people’s achievements can distract you from your own successes and career goals. Show genuine support to your co-workers instead of spite. Instead of being envious, share in your co-worker’s success, and recognize it as a step toward the greater goals of the company. Redirect your jealous energy into something positive, challenging yourself to work harder.

December 10, 2019
What your hairstyle says about you

Hairstyle is becoming one of the most considered fashion among most men in the recent past. This has been attributed to the fact that it helps a person to be confident of himself and also send a certain meaning to society.

Here are some popular hairstyles among men and what they portray of that person;

1. Bald

Some guys opt to clean shave their heads. This shows that the man has enough confidence and this makes the men to be perceived as quite attractive by women.

2. Dreadlocks

Men with dreadlocks have managed to overcome different stereotypes associated with locking hair as in the past. Those who keep dreadlocks represents free-spirited people who do not necessarily fit in the art industries as perceived by many.

3. Buzz cut

This is where the hair is clipped close to the scalp leaving the face more defined. This hairstyle shows men who are busy and completely lack the time for complicated hairstyles.

4. The fade

This involves gradually cutting the hair on the back as well as the sides shorter as it gets closer to your neck. Some men chose to have this style and inclusion of a buzz cut and dreadlocks. Men who opt for a fade are concerned about their looks and hence take grooming seriously and tend to be stylish.

5. Coloured hair

Men have also chosen to have their hair coloured just as women. Men who have coloured their hair be it in dreadlocks, short hair or other hairstyles are perceived to be daring, adventurous and are usually fun to be around.

5. Afro

Some men choose to let their hair grow and allow it to shrink. These are perceived to be more understanding of women since they can relate to women’s hair struggles and have more assertive of themselves.

December 10, 2019
5 Things you should never do in the morning

If you ever feel like you don’t get enough done in the day, it’s because you’re doing what you should never do in the morning.
One of the worst feelings we can experience at 5 p.m is thinking, “I was so busy today but I accomplished nothing.”
This lack of progress is the greatest source of demotivation. It’s why employees quit, small businesses fail, and why we are tempted to give up on our dreams.
But it doesn’t have to be that way.Did you know that just five common morning mistakes are holding you back?
Most self-employed experts fall into these time traps. But the most successful independent entrepreneurs overcome these obstacles and dominate their days. In turn, their productivity and income soars.
Here are five things you must NEVER do in the morning if you want to get more done, have more focus, and be hyper-successful.

#1 – Never Hit The Snooze Button
Sleeping longer is probably one of the greatest desires you had back when you were working for a big corporation. But when you hit the snooze button you are subconsciously telling your big goals and dreams that they don’t matter. That leads to a lack of urgency in life, lower productivity, and frustration by the end of the day.
Make the mindset switch this habit. When your alarm goes off, wake up with a mindset of taking on the day and tackling your top project so you make progress every morning.

#2 – Never Write Your To-Do List
Wait, what? How am I supposed to get organized?
The truth is that if you’re setting your to do-list first thing in the morning, you’re already too late!
You need to know your number one priority the night before, and have a plan in place to start working on it immediately. That’s how the most successful people in the world, from the greatest writers of today (like J.K. Rowling and Stephen King) to the most successful artists in history, control their mornings.

#3 – Never Check Email
One of the worst things you can do is roll over and start scrolling through your email. When you do that, time seems to disappear into a black hole and you can never get it back. Worse, email often leads to social media, and then you can kiss another 30 minutes goodbye.
While it’s tempting to check your email for work payments, important meetings, and the final score of the Yankees game, you must realize that email can wait.
You are much better off going to work on your top priority with a clear mind. This is how you make profound progress in the work. Give at least 30 minutes, if not 60 or more, to your top priority.

#4 – Never Mindlessly Surf The Internet
Here’s a scary thing to do. Add a time tracker application to your computer and mobile phone that can tell you how much time you spend each day on every website you visit, from Facebook to Instagram to CNN.com, TheDrudgeReport.com, and even your bank account. You can also use this free Time Tracker sheet.
When you see those numbers you might be shocked… and maybe ashamed you wasted so much time. Just think of what else you could be doing with those hours that correlate directly to your success.
Don’t let your Internet rob you of the progress you so badly want to make. ]
Add another program to your computer called Internet Freedom. This app can block you from visiting certain websites or from using the Internet at all during certain times.
With these new boundaries in place, you’ll have made time for what matters.

#5 – Never Eat or Drink Food That Makes You Feel Unwell
Many of my clients have impeccable morning routines. They wake up early, they set their minds to a positive attitude, they give gratitude, and then they spend time thinking about growing their empires.
It sounds like the perfect morning, and for some it is, but for others, the tranquility and success of this morning is all but destroyed with poor nutrition habits.
They eat cereal, milk, and juice for breakfast, then wonder why they are falling asleep and no longer productive at 10 a.m. Or worse, they consume 300 calories of sugar in their morning mug of caffeine, leading to a hard crash at 11 a.m., and then in order to compensate they have more caffeine and processed foods at lunch to get “energy.”
Too many people lose the day through their diet rather than their work habits. Don’t make the same mistake.
Make a note of what you eat and how you feel. Establish cause and effect between what goes in your mouth and how you feel in your mind. (It’s a direct relation!)
When you find the right fuel for your efficiency, you can double or triple your productivity, even if you already have an effective morning routine in place.
These are the 5 secret habits missing from so many of my client’s morning routines, and possibly from yours, too. But when you follow all of these NOT to-do rules, you’ll protect yourself from the time-management pitfalls holding you back in life.

December 9, 2019
4 Things about social media you should know

Here are facts about social media you should know:

1 Most of what goes out on social media is ‘content-based’: a lot social media inclined people are particular about their likes, followership, retweets, impression and clicks and also because they want to trend. So they put out an event of their life that might be bizarre, crazy and odd just to get attention. Whether consciously or unconsciously the posts put up on social media are ‘content-based’ rather than real-life events.

2 Some of what is put up on social media is for clout: one of the growing buzzwords of 2019 was clout chasing, it is basically creating a post on social media to give you underserved attention because you want to trend and get popular on social media. Many young people are desperate to be famous or popular so they post up a ridiculous post or misleading post to give them attention. This has been the order of social media have you see many people posting sex tapes, misleading motivational stories and many ridiculous posts just to get attention and trend.

3 People put up their best, fun life on social media: there is really no realness to what goes up on social media has most time people are conscious of worthy Facebook, Instagram pictures to get likes. Hence social media doesn’t see the real you or the behind the scene events of your life, so next time you see a post on social media and you’re beating yourself for not being up to standard, remind yourself that this is only what they want you to see.

4 Not everything is true: one of the mind-blowing misleading social media posts ever shared was by Blessing Okoro, a social media personality who allegedly claimed to have built a house for her 30 th birthday whereas the house was not hers, she faked the ownership of the house with a motivational caption and she got a lot of congratulatory messages meanwhile the house did not belong to her.
NB: to live a peaceful and content life do not believe everything that goes on social media, take the one that will motivate you to be better and sieve the once that makes you feel depressed.

December 9, 2019
Most of us underestimate our own beauty and this leads to undermining our qualities and also abilities. It is important that everyone knows they are beautiful in their own and unique ways.

You are more attractive if you notice these signs:

Your attractive nature will make people try to look at you more than once when you pass past them on the streets. This is a clear sign your beauty is irresistible.

1. People always feel at ease in your presence

If you notice that your friends always prefer a chat all the time you are free or are open to discuss any issue in your presence, they like who you are and find you more attractive.

2. You receive messages and calls from different people

Those people who find you more attractive will by all means possible try to reach and talk to you. It does not mean that they want a relationship with you, they may just want to hear you chat or wish to enjoy your company at some point.

3. People maintain a closer distance when talking to you

People who find you attractive will shorten the distance between you and them to enjoy the conversation you have.

December 9, 2019
Habits that can make you lose respect at your workplace

Some aspects of office etiquette are generational.

Others have stood the test of time.

Many of the ways you act at home or with friends may be offensive in a work environment.

The problem is that not many will speak out when they are made uncomfortable. They will simply tolerate it publicly and make a mental note.

The mistake for the offenders is to be unaware or assume you got away with poor behavior.

Then you wonder why you struggle getting people to follow you or support you in major opportunities.

Listed below are offenses that may seem like nothing too egregious by themselves, but a few put together will make others roll their eyes every time they see you coming.

1. Oversharing

Your weekend party selfies and detailed dating antics may seem harmless and fascinating … to you.

But too much sharing of details and events may give people the impression you are narcissistic and overly in need of attention.

Worse, any inappropriate stories highlight your immaturity and lack of discretion. Always leave people wanting more.

The easiest way to assess is to tease a story, and then see if they ask you for more detail.

2. Complaining

It’s good to have an office environment where expressing your dissatisfaction is welcome and encouraged.

But some people complain about nearly everything without sincere justification.

Don’t let a poor attitude or even a bad day keep you from advancement and likeability.

Pick your battles and be a fixer, or find a constructive way to vent.

3. Lying or stealing

Some people think a little white lie is acceptable.

Everyone exaggerates their resume, right? Wrong! There are many people who actually believe any lying is unacceptable behavior.

The same goes for taking things that aren’t yours be they supplies or office trinkets.

Small unethical behavior is still unethical behavior, and if people witness you breaking the rules or the law openly in small ways, they will think that you are unethical elsewhere in bigger ways as well.

4. Slacking

Workdays are hard enough without having to pick up the extra slack for those who don’t carry their fair share of the load. People on the team know who is not pulling their weight.

Too many missed days can make your co-workers who are showing up regularly feel resentful. Put in the effort or find a job that truly motivates you.

5. Being late

Whether you are late to work, late to meetings, or late with deadlines, people tire of always having to wait for someone to show up.

It makes you appear selfish, unorganized, and disrespectful of other’s time.

There are plenty of tools to help you keep track of appointments. Make the effort or no one will trust you.

6. Sharing drama

No one has time for tantrums and excuses. Life can be a challenge for everyone at one time or another.

Having a problem or mild expression of emotion won’t hurt you the first time, but if a pattern develops, people will avoid you like the plague.

7. Gossiping

People may enjoy hearing you dish salaciously about what’s going on with Susie’s promotion or Bill’s marriage, but at the same time they are judging you. They are saying to themselves that this person cannot be trusted with sensitive information.

8. Being coarse

Cussing is common today on TV and even in the office, but that doesn’t make it acceptable in people’s minds.

Dropping the F-bomb publicly and telling risqué stories classifies you as uncouth and can keep you from those upscale meetings. A little polish and discretion goes a long way in building a respected image.

9. Dressing too casual

It’s great that many offices don’t require suit and tie anymore, but sweatpants and pajamas takes things a little far even for casual Friday.

It’s always better to dress at least one level better than is required.

You will feel more professional and people will admire you for your fashion sense.

10. Acting hypocritical

“Do as I say and not as I do” will not serve well as a way of helping others and it will diminish your authority quickly.

Lead by example. Adopt an attitude of being consistent and people will depend on you.

11. Blaming others

People appreciate and respect others who can take responsibility for their own actions and experience. Throwing others under the bus makes you look irresponsible and petty.

Leadership opportunities go to those who are accountable and can elevate others rather than tearing them down.

December 5, 2019
7 Mistakes that can get you sacked from work

Getting fired is one of the difficult things to deal with; especially if you did not see it coming. There are many reasons that could make you lose your job.

The truth is, anyone can get fired. The only difference is that the reasons vary from one employee to another.

No matter how hardworking you are, there are a number of mistakes that could attract a warning letter or even land you in trouble.

In some reported cases, some employees were fired for very unrealistic reasons or as a result of office politics.

However, some reasons for being fired are usually so genuine and you can never really get a chance to defend yourself. Simply because you know you did the wrong thing.

Here are the mistakes that put you at risk of losing your job.

1.Desertion/ Absconding duty

This will earn you a direct ticket to unemployment! Failing to go to work without getting authority or permission from your employer is a dangerous game to play.

Some employees tend to have a crazy habit of taking a break without informing their supervisors.

Another trick employees use is showing up at work and sneaking out with no intention of coming back.

These are not the right cards to play and to avoid being fired, you should have the discipline to always do what is expected of you.

2.Underperforming

Being unable to deliver or finish your tasks on the required deadlines can get you in a mess. You might be given another chance but failure to prove that you are worth being retained can render you jobless.

3.Lateness

You can be pardoned several times especially if you have a valid reason. However, if you make it a habit, be prepared to receive your termination letter.

4.Misusing company resources

This is a trap that many employees fall for. There is always a temptation to use the company resources for personal gains. Even so, it is best that you resist this temptation.

Examples of misusing company resources is like using company cabs to run personal errands or hiring out company items in exchange for money.

5.Poor interaction with other employees

Emotional intelligence is a trait that comes in handy in office relationships. Being rude, mean or unfriendly to other colleagues will not amount to anything good.

If your boss notices that you cannot work well with others, this can be a genuine reason for you to leave.

6.Being rude to your boss

Never show your boss the ugly side. You always have to be the sane one if your boss is ever mean.

This does not mean you should be his punchbag but always learn how to control your emotions and language when speaking to him.

7. Having a negative attitude

Negativity can be a killer for your career. In a workplace set up, it is advisable to be open-minded and have a positive attitude towards the tasks and assignments given.

Negative people make it difficult to achieve the company’s goals because they are always shooting down the ideas of others and fail to give better suggestions.

Negativity also affects performance since the employee is always in doubt about whether the set objectives are achievable.

November 29, 2019