Survey reveals that over one-third of individuals opt to sleep separately from their partners.
An increasing number of couples are choosing to prioritize a good night’s sleep by sleeping in separate beds, leading to what is often referred to as a “sleep divorce.”
According to a recent survey conducted by the American Academy of Sleep Medicine (AASM) in Illinois, over one-third of respondents admitted to occasionally or consistently sleeping in a different room than their partner. This trend highlights the significance individuals place on achieving quality sleep.
Dr. Seema Khosla, a pulmonologist and spokesperson for the AASM, explained in a press release accompanying the survey findings, “We know that poor sleep can have a negative impact on mood, and individuals who are sleep-deprived are more prone to arguments with their partners. This can lead to resentment towards the person responsible for the sleep disturbance, ultimately affecting the quality of the relationship.” The statement highlights the potential consequences of disrupted sleep on interpersonal dynamics.
Dr. Seema Khosla further stated, “Having a restful night’s sleep is crucial for both physical and emotional well-being. It’s understandable that some couples opt to sleep separately to prioritize their overall health and happiness.”
The survey also revealed that a higher percentage of men, specifically 45%, reported sleeping in a different room “occasionally or consistently” compared to 25% of women. This suggests a greater inclination among men to seek alternative sleeping arrangements for various reasons.
“Although the term ‘sleep divorce’ seems harsh, it really just means that people are prioritizing sleep and moving into a separate room at night when needed,” said Khosla in the release.
“However, if it is one partner’s loud snoring that is leading to separate sleep spaces, then you should encourage that partner to talk to a doctor about obstructive sleep apnea,” she said.
There is a common perception that if couples are sleeping in separate beds or rooms, their relationships must be on the rocks, noted Dr. Brandy Smith, a licensed psychologist with the virtual health care company Thriveworks — but that’s not always the case, she said.
“While it’s true that sometimes it’s indicative of a problem, it is not always a red flag,” Virginia-based Smith, who specializes in relationships and couples counseling, told Fox News Digital.The most common reasons she’s heard from patients are snoring, frequent movements that keep one partner awake or wake them too often throughout the sleep cycle, mismatched sleep/wake cycles and schedule differences, said Smith
One woman on Reddit described how sleeping apart has worked for her marriage.
“My husband and I have been married for 20 years. We have a great relationship. The last five years, we have had our own bedrooms,” she wrote.
“He likes to sleep with the TV on all night and a bright nightlight and a warm room. I like total darkness and total quiet and about 5 degrees cooler. We each just get better sleep on our own.”
A Reddit user shared their personal experience, stating that their relationship would likely have ended a long time ago if they hadn’t had separate bedrooms.
According to the user, they cited being incompatible in terms of sleep due to factors such as differing schedules, snoring, and the user’s preference for white noise. These factors contributed to their decision to have separate sleeping spaces to maintain harmony in their relationship.
The Reddit user further emphasized the detrimental impact of inadequate sleep and placing blame on the partner, highlighting how it can gradually erode relationships and create resentment.
In contrast, another individual shared their personal experience, explaining that their “sleep divorce” occurred approximately a year before their official divorce from their ex-spouse. They humorously noted that sleeping further away from someone they couldn’t stand anymore surprisingly resulted in better quality sleep.
For couples who would rather not sleep apart, Smith said there are other options to ensure healthy sleep.
“Given the concerns I have heard, options to consider have usually fallen into one of two categories,” she said.
“One is a health consultation to see if any medical treatments can reduce snoring or bodily movements, or the couple might explore schedule changes so that sleep/wake schedules overlap more.”
