It is agreeable that it is important to have an amicable relationship with your in-laws, if not, there may be unhappy episodes. Actually, bonding with your in-laws is a prerequisite to a happy married home. So, here are helpful tips on how to bond with your father-in-law.
1. Talk openly, but carefully
Always make sure that you talk openly with him. If you differ with his views on politics, religion or some recent news, better stay away from such topics while chatting with him. Otherwise things might just heat up a little. Instead, find some common topics, such as family, his first job, your work, or any other such topic. The more common topics you have, the easier it will be to have a light and healthy conversation with him.
2. Ask for his opinion
You are often told to keep your mother-in-law involved and ask for her advice. But this is what you must be doing with your father-in-law as well. Whenever you need an opinion, ask your father-in-law. This will make him feel important, and an opinion from an experienced person will definitely help you too. And, if at all, you don’t agree with him, don’t shove him off; just explain the reason for your different point-of-view.
Be it something like, what colour should you get your house painted in, or an opinion on a financial matter, do consult him at least once. All these things will show him that you look up to him and respect him just as your own father.
3. Try to spend quality time with him
Well, this might not be an easy task, especially if your work schedule keeps you very busy. But, if it helps you in forming a good bond, then there is no harm in giving it a try. Ask your spouse about your father-in-law’s likes and dislikes, try to find out about his hobbies, and then involve yourself in what he likes to do, be it playing some sport, meditating, going to the park, gardening, or any other thing. Also, ask him to teach you a thing or two about the activity you both are doing together. Your curiosity will flatter him, and you might become a pro at something with his help. It is a win-win situation!
4. Make him feel as special as your dad
You celebrate your dad’s birthday with all the excitement, you wish your father on every father’s day, and you have photographs with your father hanging around in your room, don’t you? Why don’t you do the same for your father-in-law as well? Pick a picture from your wedding album, where you are with your in-laws, and frame that as a gift for him. Or, plan and celebrate his birthday with the same excitement, or just plan some outings keeping his likes and dislikes in mind, be it watching a film that he likes or eating at his favourite restaurant.
5. Never criticise his child
One thing which he definitely doesn’t want to hear from you is how annoying or irritating his child is. Never discuss the negative traits of his son or daughter with him. He is a father of your better half, and no good can come from complaining about it. So, think twice before you say anything about your spouse. Also, while talking with him, keep the things related your marriage out of the discussion.
6. Always be respectful
Always remember that he is like a father figure to you and secondly, he is your spouse’s father. Therefore, treat him with respect, just the way you would treat your own father. He will not fail to notice this, and will look at you as his own daughter. This will go a long way in making your bond strong.
