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Religious Leaders propose courtship period of 6 years

 By Gabriel Udeh, Kaduna

Religious leaders are considering modifications of pre-marital classes with a view to institute important ingredients that would assist in reducing rampant cases of divorce in society. Some have already completed the modification, a clergy said.

These assertions were made during dialogue and engagement session of religious and traditional leaders on preventing and responding to Sexual and Gender-Based Violence (SGBV), at the celebration of 16th days of activism of Zamani foundation in Kaduna state.

The clergies, mostly Christian leaders also canvassed for extension of courtship time to, at least six years period between couples before marriage, adding that doing so would enable both party’s families to enquire and know more about themselves. 

Revered Solomon U. Hedima of House on the Rock church,  said in an interview that blood group, genotype and other laboraratory test be carried out, and all questions and answers relating to couples and purposes of the marriage be asked and exhausted within the period of courtship by intending couples and their families.

Rev. Hedima, who’s opinion was corroborated by Pastor John ….Akor and a Catholic Priest, said that marriage project should not be seen as something one should jump into, saying if you jump into marriage, you’ll likely jump out of it, also stressing that most couples only think and concern themselves with the wedding instead of marriage life. 

The Christian leaders who could not hide their feelings conceded that there’s need for the couples to asked all contending questions during the relationship in form of character temperament, when one is financially broke, sex satisfaction (erection) among others, which they said constituted the vast majority of problems mostly responsible for the divorce and broken homes among couples, as held during marriage counselling.

Accordingly, Father and mother’s roles and limitations and relationship between daughters, son at certain age were analysed, and resolutions arrived that there should be limit in their relationship, especially father, daughters, brother and uncles.

Earlier, the organiser and founder of the Foundation, Mrs. Talatu Zamani said 

working with SGBV over the years made her to realized that these issues have been of serious concerned.

The founder said she decided to gather stakeholders like religious and traditional leaders realizing that they’ve very important and played major roles in resolving the problem especially the rampant cases of divorce.

Mrs Zamani also said she noticed with dismay, the high rate of rape, defilement of children, domestic violence against women, divorce among other vices, were becoming alarming in the society and therefore decided to bring the stakeholders in a dialogue session to discussed and find lasting solution to reduced, prevent and to respond to the problem.

She stressed the need to look at the marriage counselling in the church, noting that a lot of couples don’t undertake counselling before marriage proper. 

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